A review of “Looper”

First of all, the movie begins with the statement that 30 years from the year 2044 (the year in which the protagonist lives) it will be impossible to dispose of a body and it is actually more convenient to use a space-time teleportation machine to send a victim back to a precise location at a precise time 30 years into the past and then have an assassin wait there, shoot the victim and dispose of the body. Well, excuse me all over the place if I think this is one of the most ridiculous plots I have ever come across in a movie. And the rest of the movie fares no better.

At some point during this movie, for example, we observe Bruce Willis sitting in a diner as he says the following to his younger-self, sitting across the table—“I don’t wanna talk about time-travel shit”. And that one sentence—I am absolutely positive—was included in the movie to resolve all the problems the audience might come up with regarding temporal paradoxes and inconsistencies in the storyline. Well, I’m sorry but that’s just lame.

Almost nothing redeems this movie. It is way too long because it includes a lot of scenes that should have been trashed in the editing room, the story is totally unbelievable, the setting of the movie sucks ass (a future where they have freakin’ hovering rocket motorcycles and the (rich) protagonist chooses to drives a crappy 1990’s mazda mx-3?—yeah right, very likely) and the acting is mediocre at best. The only thing this movie has going for it is a small surprising twist almost at the end of the movie. But I can assure you it’s only a minor twist and does not redeem the movie in the least.

I found watching this movie to be a waste of my time. Avoid it.

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